Great article, thanks! will you talk about cognitive load/metacognition next and how it could influence your ability to have a meta representation of the conversation itself? In any case, I am looking forward to read the next article on this topic.
Thanks Mathilde. The next piece on this is tomorrow!
I try to achieve that goal, yes. But I am not sure how to do that through cognitive load. I can't think of a way that is concrete enough. Let me know your thoughts if you have any!
The way I'm currently thinking of conveying how to become a 3D conversationalist is more through induction than deduction, mostly using examples.
Thanks! I hope the specifics will make sense to you tomorrow then!
But you're right, this is good for many many discipline. Somebody was calling out writers yesterday. This is definitely crucial for listening too. I'm glad you really grasped the concept!
So happy to have found this article! I have found communities where it is common to find many people capable of '3D conversation' - this skill is actively practised. We refer to it as 'being on the dance floor vs being on the balcony', and have a bunch of activities that teach this skill... conversation mapping, tracking various facets of conversation (emotional levels, logic, meta-intents...). I'll definitely be sharing this piece as a great introduction to the concept!
Another inspiration comes from a house in Waterloo that uses the term "Abstragmatics" to refer to the ability to navigate multiple levels of abstraction in a conversation - anywhere from metaphysics down to "part of me felt X when you said Y". It is incredible to be in conversation with 10 people who can all track various levels, and navigate them smoothly.
Facilitators of Circling or Authentic Relating often have a similar ability too - since their practice is built off interpersonal awareness, noticing how what is said affects people - at high fluency, it's a bit like 'seeing' conversational systems.
I've had some success teaching 'conversational mapping' to my team at work, in a way similar to how you describe it, and also live, with each person taking turns speaking, but using hand signs to indicate if they are forwarding the topic, expanding (deepening a point), 'going meta', changing the topic, etc. Super fun, and it becomes intuitive pretty quickly.
Super curious about how you noticed that you have this skill, and how you suspect it may have developed... My guess is that it is correlated with your skill at writing so clearly.
I did Touchy Feely at Stanford, and it was very similar to what you say on the feelings side. Indeed, quite an amazing experience!
Conversation mapping --> Super useful, and also crucial in problem solving, to break down goals, pbms and solutions. I'll write more on that in the future.
Is there a resource on what you're saying about these signs in a convo? A level of communication in parallel to speech would dramatically increase productivity. I want to know more!
For me on noticing --> It's how my brain works. I analyze everything, including how I'm thinking or feeling about everything. And then I think about that. That's my default mode. So it's mostly out of my control, and don't have much advice on that :(
But I'll think about your question. Maybe I figure out something!
Ooohh, yes to Minto in appearance, but it's a bit more nuanced. Ha! If only we could talk that way, I'm afraid we'd have to lose touch with our humanity 😂 Okay, here's a totally niche blog post that succinctly demonstrates via a case study how dialogue mapping works in practice, how it influences the conversation, and the resulting decisions. https://eight2late.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/mapping-project-dialogues-final-version.pdf
I'd be remiss not to say how much I appreciate your writing and idea sharing! Thank you!
This is fantastic, thanks for sharing! I've been studying argument mapping, but didn't know about dialogue mapping. Thanks for sharing the paper! It also presents alternatives to both that I didn't know, so great for further research. Thanks again!
Great article, thanks! will you talk about cognitive load/metacognition next and how it could influence your ability to have a meta representation of the conversation itself? In any case, I am looking forward to read the next article on this topic.
Thanks Mathilde. The next piece on this is tomorrow!
I try to achieve that goal, yes. But I am not sure how to do that through cognitive load. I can't think of a way that is concrete enough. Let me know your thoughts if you have any!
The way I'm currently thinking of conveying how to become a 3D conversationalist is more through induction than deduction, mostly using examples.
Thanks Tomas, I will read your next piece and let you know if I have any suggestion!
This was an interesting topic. I liked the graphical representation of the various conversations. The rat-hole graphic explained itself nicely.
I got biased by the first sentence, thinking this was about work productivity exclusively.
Instead, this could be about being a better conversationalist, a better listener, a better ...
And used the workplace conversation as illustrative.
Overall, a great refresher and informational tool to be thoughtful, focused, and listening when in a conversation.
Thanks! I hope the specifics will make sense to you tomorrow then!
But you're right, this is good for many many discipline. Somebody was calling out writers yesterday. This is definitely crucial for listening too. I'm glad you really grasped the concept!
So happy to have found this article! I have found communities where it is common to find many people capable of '3D conversation' - this skill is actively practised. We refer to it as 'being on the dance floor vs being on the balcony', and have a bunch of activities that teach this skill... conversation mapping, tracking various facets of conversation (emotional levels, logic, meta-intents...). I'll definitely be sharing this piece as a great introduction to the concept!
Oh interesting! Please do tell: What are your favorite resources on these topics?
I haven't actually found online resources that help with this - I suspect it is not yet an 'explicit superpower'. One community where I see this kind of tracking would be the LessWrong Rationality community - possibly check out their DoubleCrux technique: https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/exa5kmvopeRyfJgCy/double-crux-a-strategy-for-resolving-disagreement
Another inspiration comes from a house in Waterloo that uses the term "Abstragmatics" to refer to the ability to navigate multiple levels of abstraction in a conversation - anywhere from metaphysics down to "part of me felt X when you said Y". It is incredible to be in conversation with 10 people who can all track various levels, and navigate them smoothly.
Facilitators of Circling or Authentic Relating often have a similar ability too - since their practice is built off interpersonal awareness, noticing how what is said affects people - at high fluency, it's a bit like 'seeing' conversational systems.
I've had some success teaching 'conversational mapping' to my team at work, in a way similar to how you describe it, and also live, with each person taking turns speaking, but using hand signs to indicate if they are forwarding the topic, expanding (deepening a point), 'going meta', changing the topic, etc. Super fun, and it becomes intuitive pretty quickly.
Super curious about how you noticed that you have this skill, and how you suspect it may have developed... My guess is that it is correlated with your skill at writing so clearly.
I did Touchy Feely at Stanford, and it was very similar to what you say on the feelings side. Indeed, quite an amazing experience!
Conversation mapping --> Super useful, and also crucial in problem solving, to break down goals, pbms and solutions. I'll write more on that in the future.
Is there a resource on what you're saying about these signs in a convo? A level of communication in parallel to speech would dramatically increase productivity. I want to know more!
For me on noticing --> It's how my brain works. I analyze everything, including how I'm thinking or feeling about everything. And then I think about that. That's my default mode. So it's mostly out of my control, and don't have much advice on that :(
But I'll think about your question. Maybe I figure out something!
Oh wow - this reminds me of Jeff Conklin's work on Dialogue Mapping
+ Wicked Problems. I've tried to do this (mapping/tracing) in meetings, but it's extremely challenging to do it while participating! https://www.amazon.com/Dialogue-Mapping-Building-Understanding-Problems-ebook-dp-B00ANVNAF8/dp/B00ANVNAF8/
Ah yes, Minto talks a lot about these trees. This is how we should talk (rather than how we do!). Thanks for sharing
Ooohh, yes to Minto in appearance, but it's a bit more nuanced. Ha! If only we could talk that way, I'm afraid we'd have to lose touch with our humanity 😂 Okay, here's a totally niche blog post that succinctly demonstrates via a case study how dialogue mapping works in practice, how it influences the conversation, and the resulting decisions. https://eight2late.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/mapping-project-dialogues-final-version.pdf
I'd be remiss not to say how much I appreciate your writing and idea sharing! Thank you!
Aw thank you!
This is fantastic, thanks for sharing! I've been studying argument mapping, but didn't know about dialogue mapping. Thanks for sharing the paper! It also presents alternatives to both that I didn't know, so great for further research. Thanks again!